Love, Marriage, and Baby Carriages

Here is my attempt to blog about something other than a "monthly" update :)

 Being a new momma I spent my fair share of time trying to find my niche in motherhood, wife-hood, and general life-hood. I think it's something that all first-time mom's must experience to one degree or another.  In our days before Cale I spent a lot of my time absolutely spoiling Alan and Bentley rotten, hanging out with my girlfriends, and doing whatever I wanted to do when I wanted to do it. (Ha! How life has changed?!)

I really struggled to find myself in the sleepless days of early motherhood. Everything that I had went to Cale, and on good days when there was time and energy left over, it went to Alan and Bentley. By the end of those long days I found myself looking in the mirror while brushing my teeth in the evenings and finding a very tired looking, not well kept momma.  I shared this feelings with Alan, who assured me 'this too shall pass.' And, he was right. I finally felt like I was "getting" this whole mom thing. I was learning not to be too hard on myself and to trust my instincts when it came to parenting Cale. I've learned of the beauty of motherhood. I now totally respect that each child, each mom, and each family is different---and beautiful, just how God intended it to be!

Alan was my rock during my learning curve---and, he continues to be! Our marriage has flourished as new parents.  I still have 'hard' days, days where I go to bed feeling absolutely exhausted, defeated, and beat-up. BUT, those days are shadowed by the great days we have as a family of four. On crazy good days, I'm even intrigued by the thought of having another baby---don't panic, those sleepless nights quickly change that thought, haha!

When it came down to preparing to welcome a baby to our home, I also did my fair share of reading on nurturing my marriage while caring for a newborn. Even before Cale was here I knew the importance of keeping our marriage healthy during the trials and tribulations that this transition would bring. Both of our boys deserved to live in a house with happy, loving, rock-solid parents!

From the moment he was born, recovering from my c-section while trampsing down to the NICU every three hours to love on my little one, our teamwork as a husband and wife increased one-hundred-fold. It was an amazing feeling! At this point in our relationship, after seven years of being with Alan, I can say our teamwork and communication have never been stronger. No crazy, sleep deprived fighting. Just normal adult communication to work out any issues that we have had along the way. Parenting with him as my partner melts my heart. He's amazing!

Don't get me wrong---my husband isn't a Mike Brady, he comes with imperfections. He's ornery. He isn't the best "house husband" (aka: he lacks in participation in the house chores department). Going into this transition, I told him I needed his encouragement more than anything. I would continue to serve my family in all the ways I did before the baby, as well as the vast majority of baby duties, as long as I had his encouragment and kind words. He does this for me very thoughtfully! He has a HUGE heart, and he loves me and the boys with every single bit of it ;)

I love being his wife and the mother of his boys. I'm so proud of us, and I'm so happy that we aren't just surviving these hard sleepless days---we are thriving!! God is so good to us!

Before the Firefighters Ball, February 2012