Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Posted by Lindsi at 12:26 AM
Sunday, August 29, 2010
Posted by Lindsi at 7:00 AM
Saturday, August 28, 2010
This past week the weather was absolutely beautiful in our area---high's in the 80's and lows in the 60's. I had Wednesday and Thursday off work, so my Gram and I went to the Tulsa Zoo! :) We had a day to always remember!
With these pictures being shared, I have to admit to y'all that I marveled in God's creation all day long! Gram was pointing out colors and features of each animal, and I couldn't help but think about how wonderful our God is. What a truly divine imagination He has to create such beautiful creatures?! Something about the warm sunshine on my skin and the reflections of God's love left me with a full, happy heart.
Despite recent trials, I am very thankful for this season of my life! I couldn't imagine being in any other spot. For months I have questioned God's plan for our lives---foolishly, of course. Heck, I still don't know what the future holds for our family, but I do know that everything's going to be mighty perfect! God gives us a sense of peace when we ask Him for it, a calming peace that lets our spirit finally rest. I can see a light at the end of the tunnel, and I'm running towards it :)
"I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us." --Phil 3:14
Posted by Lindsi at 6:45 AM
Friday, August 27, 2010
Posted by Lindsi at 10:25 AM
Thursday, August 26, 2010
In honor of my very first week of menopause, I have decided that Thursdays will be dedicated to posting my menopausal (or not so menopausal) thoughts. I'm crummy at journaling, so this can serve as my documentation of the trials and triumphs of my Lupron journey.
With that being said, I feel like I totally kicked butt this week! :) I have experienced a few side effects, but nothing to write home about. Ive always prided myself on being a good sleeper and a good pooper (maybe from my infant days?!); however, no longer do I sleep more than 3 straight hours and my bowel movements are quite tough. Neither of these are unaffected by the vitamin supplements Im taking, though. I'm taking several different vitamins for energy and mood--even though I'm not sleeping much at night, I feel GREAT during the day! And the #2 problem?! Heeeellllllloooo, Benefiber in my water....of course, in addition of my daily Raisin Bran, Fiber One bar, and apple. Im just a regular kinda girl!
So, take that, menopause!? Is that all you got for me!??
Posted by Lindsi at 5:19 PM
Thursday, August 19, 2010
I had this nice, inspirational, "pump-me-up" type blog all ready to go for today, but I've taken a step backwards. :( Today is the day that I start my Lupron Depot injections. I'm ready to take on menopause. In fact, I'm going to punch it in the face and push it down to the ground. I just knew when I woke up this morning I'd hear some sort of aggressive theme music in my head---kind of like when a super hero or athlete performing an amazing task. I haven't decided on my theme music yet, but that's something I'm still pondering....!
Anyhow, that's totally NOT how my day started. Poo. While in the shower this morning something snagged my hair. At closer inspection, I noticed that the BIG diamond from my wedding ring was missing! :( Instant freakout--after washed the shampoo out of my hair--tears, like alligator sized tears. Alan and I tore apart the bedding at 4:50am this morning and combed through our bedroom carpet. I'm fairly certain (97%) that it was still in place when I was getting ready for bed last night. I'm at work now, no diamond, swollen eyes, and an upset belly. Ugh! .....so Menopause, I'm not really in the mood for you today, ok?!
On a humorous noted, I was crying and didn't know how to tell Alan that I'd lost my diamond from the beautiful ring that he'd picked out for me several years ago. I turned on my bedside lamp and he somewhat rustled around under the sheets. The first words out of my mouth to him, "Don't move!" In his sleepy, dreaming state for some ODD reason (because we all know he's odd--he's a boy), he thought that I'd pooped the bed and was instructing him not to move! He pulled the sheets up over his head. I'm
fairly certain positive that I have NEVER pooped the bed at any time beyond my infant years. He makes me giggle!
Posted by Lindsi at 7:14 AM
Wednesday, August 18, 2010
I imagine at this point you have tears streaming down your face, much like I did. I read this poem today on another blogging site, and it tugged at the strings of my heart. What a beautiful message!! :) (and, sorry for making y'all cry-hehe!) This is for those of us that are "mothers" that have had to say goodbye to their babies much before we thought to be an appropriate time. I know over the past two years our family has lost some dear loved ones, so my babies are well taken care of in Heaven--and probably spoiled rotten! I wouldn't have it any other way :)
Posted by Lindsi at 10:36 AM
Monday, August 16, 2010
Tonight is our first night of our Girls Bible Study :) Yaaaay!
I'm so excited to get together with my friends for some girl time and spiritual growth. Rachel and I had talked about hosting one several months ago, and its finally come to fruition. We decided on the newest Beth Moore book, "So Long, Insecurity." Lets face it, what girl doesn't struggle with insecurity in some way, shape, of form?! I'm just excited to be with my closest girlfriends studying from God's word--and probably eating some good food, hehe :) I'm convinced that I have the BEST group of girlfriends in the whole wide world!
Posted by Lindsi at 1:26 PM
Friday, August 13, 2010
I feel blessed beyond belief at the moment :)
I have the most amazing family in the whole wide world.
First of all, my mother-in-law showed up at our house on Wednesday morning out of the blue with a "pick me up" and encouraging gift for me. A SPA GIFT CARD to use over the next six months when I'm feeling down and out. Little did she know that I'd had a rough, tearful 24 hours.....it's amazing how God puts these situations in your life. Its SO encouraging to know that I have so many people who love and support me---just for being me! Amazing and humbling.
And second of all, when I got home from work tonight I found my big pretty mirror FINALLY hanging in my entryway after living in our house for nearly a year. My father-in-law had come over to check on my little Bentley boy during the day, so while he was here he put himself to work! :) He will never know how happy that makes me that he went out of his way to serve us like that. My husband is a hard-working, busy man, so he doesnt always have time to devote to those things. And Lord knows, Im not skillful with the tools. I can say thank you to him, but I dont think it begins to serve my emotions justice.
When I think about each of those stories and the love that was exemplified, I think about how much God loves us! :) Those two really touched my heart this week, and reminded me that God brought me to this point in my life---and I know His plans are BIG and GREAT for us! Not only did it remind me of God's faithful love to His children, but it also encouraged me to be that light in someone else's life. I hope that this weekend and the following week, I can exemplify that kind of love to someone who needs it!
Posted by Lindsi at 7:01 PM
Monday, August 9, 2010
Posted by Lindsi at 2:57 PM
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Thanks for letting me have my pity party last night, I woke up this morning with my big girl panties on :)
I'm so thankful the God I serve has a sense of humor. I had the most AWFUL pregnancy dream last night, ugh! It started off with me going to the doctor with some post-operation belly pain. He informed us that we were pregnant and in LABOR with a full-term baby....how delightful, right?! Wrong, terribly wrong. He made us rush to the hospital, which was a horrible experience. No one there knew what was going on, the residents were attempting to provide less-than-ideal care, and Alan apparently could've cared less that I was having a baby! He kept telling me, "I don't care what you name IT." Right before they took me into surgery, two girls wearing hospital scrubs came into my room with some sort of horrendous looking piercing kit "to pierce my girl business." I questioned them, asking if this was normal procedure, and was informed that "the hospital provides this to their patients so that they come out of surgery looking good and 'still desirable' to their husbands." Ahhhh!! I declined my piercing :) Anyhow, after I shook off the sleep this morning, I couldn't help but crack a smile. God is FUNNY! :) I feel that He gave me that funny/scary situational dream to scare the living daylights out of me about labor. So, officially, I am not ready for childbirth :)
Posted by Lindsi at 7:02 AM
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
First of all, Im going to start off by apologizing to all of you reading: Im sorry. I dont want my blog to be a place of negative, sad feelings; however, when I started this blog it was to document our journey to become parents. So, that's what I'm going to continue doing. Don't get tears in your eyes yet--this isnt necessarily bad news--in fact, its NOT bad news in the slightest. Im just having a moment.....bare with me. After I get this off my chest, I plan to take a deep breath, put my big girl panties on, and deal with it.
....We went today for our post-op doctors visit. I got to see all the pretty, cool pictures of my insides--except my ovaries, they weren't pretty. Several things: LOTS of endometriosis, a LARGE septum in my uterus, and last but not least, a little inguinal hernia friend that still remains. He was very pleased with how my uterus instantly corrected itself after he removed the large growth, and he was equally as pleased with how much endometriosis he was able to remove. There is some endometriosis that cannot be removed surgically that is growing inside the uterine wall, so that will require medicinal treatment. Phew! Lupron. Basically, long-story-short, I will start injections on August 19th that will throw me into a medically induced menopause for the next 6 months....holy geez. I wont go into all of this with you, but we would appreciate your prayers over this time :) (Alan mainly.) I'm nervous, mostly because I have NO IDEA what to expect. They assured me some hot flashes, night sweats, sleeplessness, and mood swings. Oh boy, how fun?!?
I'm GOOD, though! :) After all of this is said and done, we WILL have a family! It all settled in with me today when Alan and I were going over our "family timeline." It was made clear that we will not, cannot, have a baby in our little hands until sometime during 2012--which really hit me hard for some reason. That is why Im having the "blues" this evening. Forgive me for feeling this way. I know plenty of girls who can't have babies, which makes me feel super selfish for these feelings.
I plan on taking some time over the next few days to write down ALL the plenty positive things about our situation. I expect some trying times over the next six months, and I want my list to refer to on the days that I'm not feeling up to par. (Plus, Alan mentioned its best that I write them down. He feels like he might get in trouble for gently reminding me of these things during my what-could-be manic phases--haha!!)
Thanks for your listening ears tonight! :) I'm ready to get my "game face" on and finish making my body completely healthy.
Posted by Lindsi at 8:15 PM
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Posted by Lindsi at 9:57 PM